You’re Not Really From New York Unless You’ve Complained About These 12 Things

Ah, New York—the Empire State, where the pizza’s perfect, the attitude is sharper than a subway turnstile, and everyone’s mad about something all the time. Whether you’re from the five boroughs, upstate, Western New York, or somewhere in between that insists it’s not upstate—griping is part of the culture. If you haven’t aggressively complained while holding a bagel and dodging tourists, are you even a real New Yorker?

People Thinking New York = Only NYC

Yes, there’s a whole state up here, with trees, cows, and people who own snow shovels.

The Rent Being Criminal Everywhere

Whether it’s a shoebox in Queens or a “charming” two-bedroom in Buffalo—it’ll cost you your soul and your security deposit.

Tourists Walking Five Across in Times Square

Move. MOVE. This is not Disney World, Karen.

The MTA Being a Test of Patience and Faith

Delays, mysterious smells, and surprise saxophone solos—it’s all part of the journey.

People From Out-of-State Calling It “New York City”

No need to clarify. If we say “the city,” we mean NYC. If we say “I’m going to the city,” you know where.

Buffalo Winters That Laugh in the Face of “Cold”

If your car hasn’t been buried in snow until May, you don’t know true suffering.

Downstate vs. Upstate vs. “We’re Not Sure Where Albany Falls”

Everyone’s got a very specific idea of where Upstate begins—and they’ll fight over it.

Bagels and Pizza Outside the State Being Deeply Offensive

It’s not “just bread.” It’s a spiritual experience. And don’t get us started on “New York-style pizza” from Ohio.

Getting Tailgated on the Thruway by Someone Doing 95 in a Snowstorm

Just another Tuesday in Rochester.

Having to Pay Tolls to Get Anywhere, Including Your Own Dignity

EZPass? More like EZPain.

Out-of-Towners Not Understanding That “I’m Walking Here” Is a Lifestyle

We walk fast, we talk fast, and we complain even faster.

The Taxes That Make You Wonder Why You Still Live Here

But then you bite into a bacon-egg-and-cheese and remember: oh yeah, this is home.

Sure, New Yorkers are world-class complainers—but that’s just how we show love. Whether it’s a rant about rent, rage over rush hour, or a three-hour monologue about why your hometown pizzeria is superior, it’s all part of the Empire State experience. After all, if you’re not complaining, are you really even from here—or just visiting?

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