Ah, Illinois—the land of Lincoln, relentless cornfields, and Chicagoans constantly reminding everyone that there’s more to the state than just Chicago. Whether you live upstate, downstate, or stuck on the never-ending construction of I-55, griping about Illinois quirks is basically a rite of passage. If you haven’t passionately complained about these classic Illinois annoyances, can you even claim residency?
Chicago Traffic Being a Punishment for Past Lives
Nothing says “welcome home” like a 90-minute delay on the Dan Ryan Expressway.
Endless Road Construction Everywhere
Illinois seasons: winter, still winter, construction, still construction.
People Thinking Illinois Means Only Chicago
Surprise: cornfields and towns without skyscrapers exist here, too!
Everyone Mispronouncing the “S” in Illinois
It’s “Ill-in-OY,” people—stop making our ears hurt.
Politicians Going Directly From Office to Prison
Illinois political slogan: “Where governors make license plates.”
The Constant Debate Over Deep-Dish Pizza
Is it pizza or casserole? Doesn’t matter, just don’t insult it around Chicagoans.
The Cubs vs. White Sox Feud Splitting Families
Pick a side or risk lifelong family dinners filled with awkward silence.
Winter Lasting Approximately 11 Months
If you don’t like the weather, wait five minutes—it’ll probably snow again.
The Never-Ending Battle Over Calling It “Pop” or “Soda”
It’s pop, and we will fight anyone who disagrees (politely, of course).
Farm Equipment Holding Traffic Hostage
Two-lane highways plus tractors equals mandatory scenic drives at 15 mph.
People Assuming You Live Near Oprah or Michael Jordan
Sure, we all hang out together at Portillo’s on the weekends. Totally.
Outrageous Property Taxes Making You Question Life Choices
Illinois: come for the pizza, stay because your home won’t sell.
Sure, we Illinoisans might grumble about weather, traffic, and questionable politicians—but secretly, we take pride in our corn-fed charm, Chicago pizza debates, and our ability to survive endless winters. Complaining is just our state pastime—right behind sports rivalries and plotting our move somewhere warmer (but never actually leaving).
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