Ah, Kansas—the Sunflower State, where the wind never stops blowing, Dorothy jokes never stop coming, and flatness is both a geographical feature and a lifestyle. If you haven’t complained about these classic Kansas quirks at least once (or daily), are you even really a Kansan? Saddle up—it’s time to roast our beloved rectangle.
Everyone Asking About Tornadoes (Constantly)
Yes, we have tornadoes. No, we don’t ride them to Oz. Stop asking.
Out-of-Staters Acting Shocked That People Actually Live Here
Believe it or not, we have cities, running water, and even Target.
The Wind That Could Ruin Your Hair and Your Day
Hats, umbrellas, dignity—nothing survives Kansas wind.
Being Told It’s “So Flat” Like It’s a Personality Trait
We know. Our topography has two settings: flat, and flatter with a water tower.
Dorothy and Toto References
If I had a dollar for every “Not in Kansas anymore” joke, I could afford beachfront property in Topeka.
The I-70 Stretch That Tests Your Will to Live
You haven’t known boredom until you’ve driven across western Kansas with nothing but cows and existential thoughts.
People Thinking Kansas City Is in Kansas
Some of it is. The good BBQ is a joint custody situation—don’t make it weird.
Outrageous Weather Mood Swings
85 and sunny at lunch, snowstorm by dinner. Just another Tuesday.
The State Fair Smelling Like Livestock and Funnel Cakes
Ah yes, the annual scent of deep-fried cow.
The KU vs. K-State Rivalry Being Treated Like a Blood Feud
You must pick a side, even if you didn’t go to either school.
Rain That Comes in Sideways
Thanks to the wind, umbrellas are more ceremonial than functional.
Having to Defend That Kansas Is More Than Just Flyover Country
We’ve got history, pride, and surprisingly decent sunsets—deal with it.
Sure, we Kansans love to complain—about the wind, the weather, and the endless Oz references—but deep down, we wouldn’t trade our wide-open skies and prairie sunsets for anything. Complaining is just how we say we care—preferably while holding a plate of homemade BBQ and watching the sky for funnel clouds.
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