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Alabama, where the tea is sweet, the accents are sweeter, and college football is treated with more reverence than most national holidays. Alabamians are fiercely proud of their roots, their barbecue, and their God-given right to deep-fry absolutely anything. But behind all that Southern hospitality is a finely tuned radar for nonsense—especially from out-of-staters who don’t know the difference between a biscuit and a roll. If you’re looking to stir up some slow-cooked side-eye, here are 11 subtle ways to mildly annoy someone from the Heart of Dixie.
Ask if they wear shoes.
Yes. And they’ll use them to walk away from your tired stereotypes.
Say, “So… are you Roll Tide or War Eagle?” without knowing what it means.
That’s not a question—it’s a lifestyle declaration with generational consequences.
Call all barbecue “Texas-style.”
In Alabama, it comes with white sauce and a warning not to compare it to brisket.
Mock the Southern drawl.
That “slow” speech? That’s just them taking their time to bless your heart.
Say, “Oh, I drove through Alabama once.”
That’s like saying you understand Shakespeare because you’ve skimmed a sonnet.
Complain that it’s too hot and humid.
That’s not humidity—that’s Alabama giving you a free facial and a character-building moment.
Assume no one here has a college degree.
Cool. Now let that person with the accent out-debate you and rebuild your carburetor.
Say biscuits are “just bread.”
That’s not bread. That’s edible comfort with a butter-to-crumb ratio sent straight from heaven.
Be surprised they have beaches.
Gulf Shores. Look it up. Then go apologize to your travel agent.
Say “Alabama’s stuck in the past.”
They’ve got Wi-Fi, craft breweries, and opinions about SEC rankings—so who’s behind now?
Ask if they ever leave the state.
Why would they? Everything they need is right here—and if it’s not, Mama can make it.
Still, Alabamians are generous, loyal, and proud of their traditions—whether it’s football, food, or front porch conversations that last until the lightning bugs come out. Just show some manners, say “yes ma’am,” and don’t knock the casserole unless you’re real sure your life insurance is up to date.
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