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If These 10 Things Make Sense to You, You’ve Been in Utah Far Too Long


Utah, where the mountains are majestic, the fry sauce flows freely, and every second person you meet is named either “Brayden” or “McKinzleigh.” It’s a land of stunning landscapes, drive-thru soda shops, and the only place on Earth where you’ll find a snowstorm, a desert, and a temple all within 15 minutes. If these ten things feel like home, you’ve been in Utah far too long—and you’ve probably got a church calling, a season ski pass, and a freezer full of funeral potatoes.

You’ve uttered the phrase “What ward are you in?” before even asking someone’s last name.

Church directory first, actual personality later.

You treat fry sauce like it came down from the mountaintop with Moses.

If you don’t mix ketchup and mayo here, you might get excommunicated—from Utah.

You’ve seen four seasons before lunch and still left the house in a hoodie and flip-flops.

Sunny with a 100% chance of blizzard.

You’ve had strong opinions about the best “dirty soda” shop—and can name 3 on your street.

Coke + coconut + lime = Utah’s version of a stiff drink.

You’ve gone hiking and seen someone in full business attire… with a baby strapped to their chest.

It’s not just a hike—it’s a multitasking spiritual journey.

You’ve stopped at a gas station and seen Diet Coke, essential oils, and baby bows all sold at the register.

We call that a “one-stop Mormon pop shop.”

You’ve scheduled your entire life around General Conference weekend and planned your snacks accordingly.

Cinnamon rolls, blankets, and not a single pair of pants in sight.

You’ve driven for hours and passed nothing but red rock, a dinosaur museum, and one random giant soda can sculpture.

Weird roadside art? Mandatory.

You know the exact moment when “the inversion” hits—and you immediately consider moving to St. George.

Breathing? Optional. Complaining about air quality? Required.

You’ve seen more Subarus than sedans and more kids than adults at every public event.

Bonus points if you’ve seen someone skiing with a toddler on their back.

If you read this while sipping a Swig concoction called “The Second Wife” and debating whether to hike or hit the temple, congratulations—you’re officially seasoned in the ways of Utah. Whether you’re in Provo, Park City, or somewhere deep in the red rock canyons, you’ve embraced the unique, squeaky-clean chaos of the Beehive State. Just remember: Sundays are for family, soda is sacred, and there’s always room for one more casserole.

The post If These 10 Things Make Sense to You, You’ve Been in Utah Far Too Long appeared first on When In Your State.



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