You’re Not Really From Texas Unless You’ve Complained About These 12 Things

Ah, Texas—the Lone Star State, where everything is bigger (including our complaints), the BBQ is sacred, and you don’t need a reason to throw a parade or start a rivalry. From the scorching summers to the unpredictable weather, life in Texas comes with a side of sass and a whole lot of pride. If you haven’t passionately complained about at least half of these Texas quirks while swigging sweet tea and wondering if it’s really time to fire up the grill, are you even really from here?

The Heat That Hits You Like a Furnace From Hell

It’s not just hot—it’s “hold your breath, hope you don’t melt, and pray for a cloud” hot.

Out-of-Towners Thinking “Everything’s Bigger” Means You Own a Ranch

Yes, we have cows. No, we don’t all own them. But we do know a guy who does.

Driving 30 Miles for Anything and Everything

Need groceries? That’s an hour-long commitment. Want a Starbucks? Better pack a lunch.

The Texas vs. Oklahoma Rivalry Being a Matter of Life or Death

Football season? Don’t even think about crossing state lines if your allegiance is wrong.

People Asking About Our Accents Like They’re Fascinating

Yes, we say “y’all” and “fixin’ to.” No, you don’t need to imitate it. It’s not a novelty act.

The Never-Ending Construction on Every Road in Every City

If you’ve been to Texas, you’ve been stuck in traffic caused by a “5-year construction project” that’s now in year 15.

The State Fair Being a Sacred Institution

No, you can’t skip it. Yes, it’s overpriced, and yes, we’ll still go and get fried everything.

Texas Drivers Treating Turn Signals Like They’re Optional

It’s not so hard to flick a switch. But here? We don’t have time for that nonsense.

The State Being So Huge, You Could Drive 8 Hours and Still Be in Texas

Just try to leave Texas on a road trip. You’ll need snacks, a nap, and a minor existential crisis.

People Asking If We Really Rode Horses to School

No, but we did have pickup trucks, cowboy boots, and a healthy appreciation for country music.

The BBQ Debate That Never Ends

Brisket, ribs, sausage—what’s the best? Don’t ask unless you’re ready for a full-on debate that could last until next July.

Tornadoes, Hurricanes, and Wildfires All Having Equal Opportunities to Ruin Your Week

Not sure if it’s safe to be outside? It’s probably not. But we’ll still go to work because that’s how we roll.

Sure, we Texans love to complain—about the heat, the traffic, and the BBQ snobbery—but deep down, we wouldn’t trade our vast skies, state pride, or love of everything bigger for anywhere else. Complaining here isn’t just tradition—it’s an art form, served with a side of brisket and a cold beer. Just don’t mess with Texas. We’ll let you know when we’re done complaining—maybe.

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